Sefer Yom Leyom, Marriage
1. It takes two humble people to make a marriage successful.
2. Marriage is about giving to another and then having children to give too.
3. If you don’t have peace with yourself, it is difficult to have with another, especially a spouse that sees all your flaws and mistakes.
4. Love that comes quickly is flawed. One that builds over time is strong and real.
5. In marriage you will be faced many times to give up many of your desires in order to make someone else happy in that process, their desires might need to come before your own.
6. Being a step ahead of your spouses needs goes a long way to providing a healthy home.
7. If there is no peace in the home, children grow up with many confusions and anger.
8. We push away from our spouse when we need them the most because we don’t feel like they care and thereby we create a chain reaction and we need them all the more.
9. The holiness of one spouse effects the other.
10. Sometimes in marriage you have to do a lot of acting and pretending so the other partner doesn’t feel your sorrow and anger.
11. A depressed partner brings grief to their spouse and children.
12. Your spouse may never truly appreciate you so sometimes you need to find their appreciation within yourself in order to carry on.
13. Don’t go to sleep or leave your home with anger.
14. Being able to say your sorry even if you don’t mean it yet, is the start to a meaningful relationship.
15. When you realize that your spouses anxiety and pains are your own, then you can both start living.
16. It is important to eat meals together and go out of the house together with your spouse so that you feel like one unit.
17. Never threaten your spouse with separation and divorce unless you are serious because the pain you cause them is far worse then the pain you yourself feel now.
18. Do not discuss your marriage with family as it is impossible for them to be impartial and you cause an everlasting friction between your spouse and them.